“Annie, you okay?” Cass stood over her, tired and drenched in sweat. Annie nodded. “Yeah.” Her weak voice came out. “You got my inhaler?” Cass handed it to her. “You PR’d, good job.” She said in a kind of far off tone, it was clear that she hadn’t. “I think you’re running the mile too.” Annie lay back on the rough grass of the football field. “Great.”
Annie sat with Cass’s mom, talking about the run as she ate a PB&J sandwich. “Got the one mile at 12.” Cass said when she finally sat down next to them. She had been talking to her trainer. “Better get your energy back hon.” Annie nodded and got up to go to the bathroom, throwing her stuff away as she walked down the stairs. She was nervous. Coach didn’t make her run the 1 mile very often.
On her way back up, she ran into Juan. Him and Jeff were just standing there, blocking the stairway. “Hey sexy” Jeff said. “Nice two-mile.” Juan nodded and gave her that look. Then he handed her his phone. “You changed your number. I want your number.”
She looked at him…just stared. Then asked, “Why?”
“I want it.”
He kept looking at her. She barely noticed when Jeff nudged her. Then he nudged her a second time, notably harder. He wanted her to walk back down the stairs. Her heart skipped a beat. They won’t do anything here. She told herself, but her mind choked up. She fought the pressure within that was trying to unlock those drawers of her past. Her emotions froze. She made herself walk down the stairs.
Fear seized her again the second they prodded her out the gates of the track. She forced a smile at the coach. He was used to seeing the girls hanging out with Juan and Jeff, he didn’t say a word.
Relief came to her when they stopped at Juan’s car and he opened the passenger-side door to get a Gatorade. “I want it.” He said again and pushed his phone into her hands. Jeff nodded at the open car door and pushed at her shoulder a little. She got the idea, the last thing she wanted was to go for a ride with them. She took the phone and quickly entered her phone number. Jeff and Juan both smiled. Juan gave her that look, and Jeff took that moment to push her hard against the car. “That the number?” he asked, as he flattened himself against her. “Yes.” She said, too weak for her own liking. They knew she was scared. He put his mouth next to her ear, sensually, as his hands wandered over her. “Good,” he whispered making sure his hands paused for a moment between her legs, “you do know what happens if it isn’t?” he said, pushing his fingers up into her shorts and laughing as she gasped. She nodded, fighting against her desire to hit him. Juan closed the door, and Jeff pulled away, leaving her standing there. She refused to cry for them again. She just stood there, stood there tall and watched them leave. When they disappeared, she let herself slump against the car. She was scared.
12:00. first call for the mile. 4 laps and she’d be done. She warmed up with Cass, tried to get ready without thinking about anything. She refused to look at Juan or Jeff. Both of them were watching from the bleachers. She got ready for the shot, took of when she heard it. Then at the 200, she broke in and battled for the inside. She wanted to do good, wanted to make Cass proud. flat at the 800. 3rd lap: too slow. She had to work on that. 7th…she sped up and took them on the fourth lap. She tied 3 ways for 5th. , not too bad. She looked up. Juan and Jeff weren’t looking. Seth was. She closed her eyes.
“She who you told us about?” A deep, chilling voice asked from the dark. “Yeah.” Mark said, trying to sound tough. I could tell he was scared. I was too, and I didn’t even know where I was.
The guy who had just spoken stepped into the light. He was big, built like a lineman. Muscular and huge, he had to weigh about 200 lbs. There was no way he was in middle school, but I wasn’t going to say anything.
“So she wants in?” he directed his question at Mark. I listened acutely, but I had no idea what he was talking about. “She said she’d do whatever it takes.” Mark told him in a small voice. I was confused, but again I knew better than to speak.
“Really?” the big guy said, drawing it out as if he didn’t believe it. “She just a skinny lil white girl…” He let his sentence trail off, but we got the picture.
“She’s tough though. And she isn’t white. Not totally, she’s part Mexican.” Mark said quickly. He pushed me forward and leaned down close to whisper in my ear “this is my gang.”
I looked at him, blotting the fear from my face as realization dawned on me.
“Well,” the big guy said, his voice suddenly so quite that I had to strain to hear, “we can do this one of two ways.” He held out a die towards Mark and smiled, I stared transfixed at it, wondering what the hell it meant. Mark snatched the die quickly from his hand and threw it into the blackness, “She’ll take the beat-in Juan, like I said she’s tough, and I won’t have anyone here fucking my girl.”
I froze as the guy came towards me, and he smiled coldly. “You ready for your initiation?” he asked in his deep voice full of hate. I tried to nod but I couldn’t move. I wasn’t sure how this could be happening, how Mark could do this to me. Five other guys started closing in on me along with Mark and the big guy. I knew I couldn’t run. I knew that Mark was counting on me to take it; he believed that I could take it, so I stood there and took it.
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